Dispatch Number Five


Yes, You Can
Move to Europe.


DATELINE:
Wednesday, November 1, 2000, at 1200 hours CDT.
Once More From the Top.
Mickey Miles Muses: What It's Like.


By Mickey Miles
SPECIAL to CornDancer.com

EDITOR'S NOTE: Mr. Miles is a professional journalist and political operative who moved to London in summer, 2000, to explore a new line of endeavour.

You are curious. I wonder what it would be like if…. I wonder if we could….

Yes, you can do it, move to London. Or Paris. Or Amsterdam. Yes, you have obligations, duties. People depend on you. So go ahead, put it off. Things now are just not quite right. Maybe in a few years, when the kids are grown. When the parents are gone. When the bills are paid. Maybe then.

One thing sticks in my mind: The world is like a book and he who does not travel, reads but a single page.

I was asked once again this week to give advice to someone I do not know who is thinking about moving his family to London. I said yes, come on.

"Is it expensive?"

A Monthly Rent of Two Grand.

Very. We pay monthly rent of $2,000 for a one-bedroom apartment. Since you have two kids, get ready to pay $3,000- $4,000 a month. Cheaper in the country, but then you have to figure out a way to get work if you work downtown like I do.

"Is it hard to get around?"

Yes, you have to learn the subway system and the bus system.

"Can I drive?"

Yes, just learn to drive on the other side of the road and be prepared to pay a fortune for gas and maintenance. Be aware that traffic moves in London at the same speed it did in the Seventeenth Century: 10 miles an hour. Gasoline costs you about $4.50 a gallon.

"What about the people?"

They speak English, have a good sense of humor, and are generally pleasant, but they don't care how you feel about this place, don't care how you are doing. You are on your own.

"What about buying groceries? My wife asked about that."

Grocery Shopping Patterns Are Different.

Lots of grocery stores here. Most are smaller, and since you may not have a car, you have to buy small sacks of groceries every day as opposed to loading your car full of them at a supermarket in the States.

"And what about the schools?"

I don't know. The wealthy send their kids away to boarding school at age 12 or so and that seems to be popular. Not having kids, I cannot answer your question.

"Well, what about the money? Can I spend dollars?"

I recommend you change your dollars right away and learn to use the local currency. Buy cheap things like newspapers so you can get used to the money. You can read the papers, too, and quickly understand the culture.

"Do the English like Americans?"

Some do, some don't, who cares. Be yourself. Don't be one of those stupid, loud-mouthed, fat Americans I see waddling down the sidewalk in front Harrod's, wagging their tails and smiling with that stupid "Golly Gee Wheeze" look on their face. Or if you do and ask me for directions, I will mumble something in a foreign language I have made up and pretend I don't understand you. Or worse than that, I will be friendly and give you wrong directions. I did that once and regretted it almost immediately, but it passed.

Life Is Not a Dress Rehearsal.

Look, here is the thing. You only live once. And life is not a dress rehearsal. Give it a shot while you still have your health. Don't do like I did. Plan your move a year, at least, in advance. First get a job and go there and look around in advance. Read everything you can. Sell everything you can. Rent all of your furniture here. Store your favorite things back home. Come over here with a wad of cash, no bills, and at least one job and a place to stay.

"Will there be pain?"

You damn right there will be pain. You will get homesick, lonely, tired. And at times you will regret it, but you will come in contact with more people from other cultures in a day than most do in a lifetime.

At the end of the day there is only reason for moving to London, or Paris, or Amsterdam: That reason is life. Life, life, life. One thing I promise, you will not be bored.

That said, I know you won't come. You're too lazy and too comfy in your little nest. So why am I wasting my time? Cheers.






EDITOR'S NOTE:

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